What is Customer Service?

Note: This draft, well now post is a year (and change) old and after a few edits I am finally posting it! Since it is still relevant so heck why not post it?! Now the other 10+ drafts that I just deleted… well they will never see the light of day.

I went into my frequent lunchtime location: Chipotle. Now if you want fast good food this is the place – especially if you are a taco/burrito fan.

There is however a drawback to going here. Have you ever seen those Visa Checkcard ads? Where the store is an assembly line that never stops? That is Chipotle.

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Office Prank – Cardboard + Free Time

I have seen a wide variety of office jokes and office pranks in my day, and might have even partaken in a few but I have never seen anything like what you will see below.

I have to wonder how the logistics of pulling something like this off. Some of my questions I would ask (in the even I was to… oh… say want to pull the below office prank):

  • How many cardboard boxes did you need to build that office?
  • How many people helped?
  • How many hours per person did it take?
  • Who’s idea was this and can I hire them?
  • Did you use anything other than tape, markers and boxes?
  • How can you possibly have that much free time? Are there any job openings?

And my question to you the reader: What is the best office prank or office joke you ever pulled off?

office prank - cardboard boxes

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Lesson in Logo Design

The past few months I have been debating how to have some logos designed and have become stuck. I often see logos I like or hate but never can decide on what direction to go. I am so stuck.

As I think about my problem, a friend sent me an email that only gave me more to worry about. When creating a company name or product you have to worry about what it will mean in different languages. Now, not all of us do – but if you plan on going global you had better do your research.

Back to logos and my problem (this is MY blog you know). So Im stuck on what to have the logos look like and I get this email. It has some samples of what could possibly be the best examples of the worst company logos/names. Take a look at the samples below, and learn from their mistakes:

Wow, what can one say. Why didnt they use a hyphen or something?

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12 Ways Social Networks are like High School

I got the idea for this post after reading how Drug dealers and software developers were similar. As I do come from a web developer background – I found it quite amusing (and quite sad at the end) and wondered if I could do the same for Social Media.

Below is my feeble attempt to compare High School and Social Networks – enjoy.

High School Social Networks
1.Wanting to be the Prom King/Queen 1.He/she with the most friends is cool
2.Telling everyone that you are great friends with the “plastics” and other “cool” kids 2.Adding all of the “Alist” personalities to your friends list
3.Leaving post it notes in or on lockers 3.Leaving comments and notes on someone’s profile
4.Joining an after hours school club 4.Having “meetups” that revolve around your favorite network/app
5.Liking that exchange student so much you take the language class that they speak 5.Liking some application that you create a mashup using APIs in some programming language you don’t know
6.Writing for your High School newspaper 6.Starting a site to cover everything in the world about Social Networks, the sites, the apps and everything else
7.Being a part of the school’s AV Club 7.Knowing how all the new apps work and trying to explain them to everyone
8.Getting kicked out of school 8.Getting banned from a network
9.Showing off or talking about your new car/phone/gadget 9.Always asking for or talking about invites to the new beta
10.Having mommy and daddy buy you something better than the other gloating kids 10.Showing off your alpha invite via your blog
11.Getting your friends together and tping the school 11.Getting your friends together for a DoS against some network/site/app
12.Hooking up with the Prom Queen or King 12.Damn – got me there. :(

If there are any that just plain out suck – let me know. If you can think of any others that fit, feel free to add them via commenting.

I also have to apologize for breaking down and having a “X things you can do” or “X ways to do X” post title. It was bound to happen eventually I guess.

UPDATE

I was just reading this post again and it hit me – what #12 could be:

12. Hooking up with the Prom Queen or King = 12. Getting bought by Google, Yahoo or some other huge company

Diary of a Demented Snow Shoveler

As Chicago gets another 6-10 inches of snow I found the reciving of this joke to be quite timely. Now Im not saying its all that funny, but to those in the Midwest and many on the East coast as well – it has been our nasty snow filled winter.

With out further ado, I present the snow joke.

December 8 6:00 PM

It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9
We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I’ve ever had!

Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!Continue reading

Why Vendors Annoy Me

Over the past few years I have averaged 3 to 6 conferences a year such as Pubcon, SES, and SMX. Chicago is also home to an SES, Ad-tech, Etail, and other smaller conferences and makes afternoon trips to see friends and check out vendors a snap.

All of these conferences have one thing in common:exhibit halls where people are trying to recruit you to buy, sell, or partner with them on some level. Sometimes they are interesting and other times its just a waste of my time, but I go back as you never know what you will find there. This leads to a large number of vendors and in turn, sales people having my email and contact information.

Depending on how sophisticated the conference is, there are different ways the vendor can get your information. Most of the time its a “Can I have your card so I can show my boss I talked to people” or “Let me scan your ID and you will qualify to win prize X” or lastly the “Put your card in the bowl and you can have swag/register to win more swag” type of come ons. No matter what method they use, they all in the end are simply trying to get your name, title, email and phone if possible. Cant blame them for trying can you?

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What do kids do when you ground them?

My office is nearby a high school that has an open campus and many frequent the small bagel shop I do at lunch. While at eating lunch today I overheard some high school girls talking about this, that and some kid named “Jimmy”. Well I didnt over hear them so much as they were talking over everything else going on.

Today’s topic that caught my ear was: “Jimmy got grounded”. It seems that Jimmy (not his real name) was grounded for doing something and wasnt too happy about it. Im assuming he was smart and didnt put up a fight and risk a longer sentence. What he did do was turn on his PC/Mac and make a movie about how pissed he was regarding the whole ordeal.

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